Hello people! I’m sorry that I haven’t written in awhile. For my next entry, I wanted to write about how young Roma people here in my town, Pazardjik, get married. Many people say that young Roma men kidnap young females and force them to marry them. For example, a man kidnaps a woman from her school and takes her away with him. Actually, more often than not, the young couple wants to get married but their parents will not allow it. When they escape, they have to be away from the town for at least one day and one night so the people can start looking for them. Of course, the friends of the boy and girl know that they have ran away and they know where they are. Once everyone in the neighborhood realizes that the couple has escaped, it is assumed that the girl is no longer a virgin and she now has to marry this boy. When they come back the two sets of parents meet and if the girl says that she wanted to escape and she wants to stay with the boy, then it is okay. If she doesn’t want to marry this boy, she remains with her family. However, it will be harder for her to marry later because she is viewed as having already been with another man. When the couple decides to get married, the family of the boy prepares a nice romantic room where they will sleep after their party celebrating their engagement. The tradition is to put a white sheet on the bed of the young couple and in the morning they check to see if there is blood on the sheet, meaning that the girl was a virgin. Virginity is very important in our culture. If they’ve already slept together for the first time on the night that they ran away, they may also bring a sheet to prove that she was a virgin. The important thing is that this is the first man that she has had intercourse with. The elderly women in the community are very wise and have specific things that they look for in the blood to make sure that it is authentic and that the girl indeed has lost her virginity that evening. The next day they display the sheet surrounded by flowers, paint the girl with Henna, dress her in new clothes, and throw a party. It is also customary for people to give gifts or money to the girl after coming to celebrate.

Well, this is most the tradition, but when I get married I won’t do it like that! Maybe because I’m older and I would like my mother to know who I want to marry, rather than escaping with someone.